We know that certain habits can be rather irksome for online dating couples, but can they ruin the entire relationship? You bet they can. What happens is during the initial introductory phases of dating in a website, we are on our best behavior. After we have gotten to know each other for awhile, we begin to relax. Now, relaxing is actually a good thing, as it allows a relationship to begin to settle into its comfort and security phase. On the other hand, this is also the time when little habits can begin to slowly irritate dating partners to the point of anger, disgust, and annoyance. There are many bad habits to avoid, but these are your top 20 worst offenders.
1. Criticism & Nagging
Criticism has never helps anybody improve. In fact it usually causes the victim to go on the defense and close themselves off. A better choice is to reinforce your partners good behavior, rather than punish the bad.
2. Public Humiliation
Some partners get what they want by embarrassing their partner with a publicly displayed disagreements. In the end, they are only humiliating themselves. It’s best to just wait until you get to the privacy of your car or home to start an argument.
3. Blaming
The blame game (blaming others for problems in a relationship) is one of the worst things you can do. Problems in relationships are more easily solved by accepting your partners for who they are (faults and all), rather than putting all the problems of the relationship onto them.
4. Grudges
While some mistakes are a lot harder to forgive than others, even if you decide to go your separate ways, it is still therapeutic to forgive your lover before moving onto your next chapter in life. You never want to enter a new relationship carrying the same old unchecked baggage.
5. Threats & Ultimatums
Some relationships thrive from various threats and ultimatums, which are usually delivered to wield control over a weaker partner. While this may seem to work in the beginning, there are only so many times a threat will hold shock value. Instead, communicate with respect and compromise.
6. Passive Aggression
While this person is not as outwardly threatening as the ultimatum giver, by punishing a partner with a smile on their face, they lose the opportunity to communicate their needs, and ultimately end up punishing themselves the most in the process.
7. Overly Dramatic
Some people seem to be the most happy when there is a certain amount of drama surrounding their life. Some like the attention, others just like the excitement. Remember, however, that most people don’t like drama, so you may be setting yourself up for perpetual relationship troubles.
8. Lateness
Lateness is often a sign of passive aggressive behavior. Relationships are a give and take proposition. You have to follow through with your partners needs (including being somewhere on time you don’t want to be), in order to enjoy the same courtesy when you are in need.
9. Anger
Anger causes many problems in life, but it can be particularly devastating to romantic relationships. Before you blow your top, take a moment to consider the impact of the outburst, and it may no longer seem worth it.
10. Jealousy
Jealousy is a sign of lack of trust and commitment in a relationship. Some people thrive off instability because they may have commitment issues, however they would find more happiness if they would just settle into a healthy, secure relationship.
11. Spying
One out of every 10 women have spied on their partner by perusing through e-mail, call lists, or even followed them to see where they were going. All new lovers should be considered innocent until proven guilty.
12. Lying
Lying is only acceptable if used to protect another partner from hurt. These are considered white lies (“You look nice.”). However, if you lie to protect your own interest (“She’s only a friend”), these are hard lies and can be detrimental to a relationship.
13. Bribing
Rewarding a partner out of trade of services is a bad way to develop a healthy relationship. Some women barter sex to get what they want, but it is actually more effective to surprise a partner with something nice, rather than make it a point of manipulation.
14. Change
Don’t go into a relationship with expectations of changing a partner. If you don’t like them now, you definitely won’t like them any better after years of trying to make them different.
15. Laziness
Partners who never do their share of chores only ask to wear on the nerves of their significant other. Good relationships take work, which means the best way to keep someone, is to pretend you never really had them.
16. ‘Excuse me’
Women are notorious for interrupting each other in conversation, it is just the way they express excitement. Men on the other hand, interpret this as disrespect.
17. ‘Thank you’
Evidence suggests that there is only one way a one sided relationship (one partner does all the chores) can exist, and that is by expressing explicit and direct thankfulness for everything they do. This is not a lesson on how to create a one side relationship, but rather a reminder to be thankful!
18. ‘I’m Sorry’
The world would be such a better place if more people would say these two simple words more often. While some people think it shows weakness to admit being wrong, it actually shows character, strength, pride, respect for yourself, and respect for others.
19. Projecting Frustration
Some couples take out their daily frustrations on each other by snapping at the smallest indiscretions. Remember that you are on the same team, take your anger out on a punch clown if you have to, but never your partner.
20. Ignoring Red Flags
Some people want someone to be their perfect match so badly, they ignore the red flags while dating online. Some of the major danger signs include narcissism, rudeness (to you and/or others), criticism, and an overly private life (won’t let you see where they live, etc).
Live… Love… and Date Prosperously!
Photo via Vicki and Chuck Rogers
