Online dating is more of a science than many people realize. Despite your honesty and good intention while on these dating websites, people are only human, and therefore guilty of irrational thought and uninformed decision making. To begin with, online dating is actually one of the best ways to meet healthy, attractive, self confident singles, according to numerous studies. Troubled, low esteem singles are actually less likely to use a dating website, thereby squelching the common myth that only unsuccessful daters use these services.
In addition, research shows that the success rate of online dating is often better than real world dating, because it allows singles to narrow their search to only those they share chemistry with. Up to 94 percent of internet daters go out with an e-partner a second time, with a good portion of these relationships lasting anywhere from seven months to a year. This is the good news. The bad news is there is still a chance you’re not using this opportunity to its fullest potential. Let’s look at how science can give you an edge while dating online.
Vague Profile
When filling out the forms on dating websites, they often tell us to be as detailed as possible, but research tells us it is actually the more vague profiles that receive the most positive attention. Singles are dreamers, in that they have a certain set of characteristics they’re looking for, and once they realize you don’t fit the bill, their interest will wane. In fact, research suggests that the moment a potential mate finds a trait they don’t associate themselves with, they will actually see your other traits as less positive. This is not saying you should lie, but rather withhold some information until later in the interview process.
Keep it Real
White lies on a profile (age, salary, height, weight, etc.) may initially get a potential mates hopes up, once they find out the truth, these hopes are quickly replaced by disappointment. This can put a greater wedge against your success, than having just been honest in the first place. According to research, the biggest white lies that tend to run rampant on dating websites are height and weight.
Peoples Choice
A lot of people take pride in being different from everyone else, but in the online dating world finding similarities are what will gain you the most success. To do this, it is recommended to include all your most “common” interests right up front (dancing, concerts, etc), saving your more obscure ones (Harry Potter, underwater basket weaving, etc.) for later. The reason being, singles consider commonality very important early on, and every strike will count against you. As you get to know each other, these types of differences will be much less off-putting.
More Choice is Not Necessarily Better
Some dating websites boast they have larger membership that anybody else on the block, but research shows this is not necessarily always a good thing. Too many choices can actually overwhelm the brain, making it harder to screen out inferior choices and ignore irrelevant information, such as hair color and music preference. This is why it is a good idea to narrow a search to the least number of members before you start to sort through them. Some websites offer special questionnaires to help narrow choices for you, although there is some question as to how effective these actually are.
Trust Your Instincts
Dating websites that claim they can find the perfect match for your personality have not yet been scientifically proven. One of your best allies is to use your own instincts when perusing through profiles. Studies show that following your own gut, and keeping your standards high, offers the best chance of making an informed decision.
Men Are From Attractiville, Women Are From St. Mullah
Studies on what features in profiles attract each sex, has found that men prefer overall attractiveness, while women are more concerned with wealth. Women are not necessarily gold diggers, but they are concerned about his job, potential, financial stability, and overall ability to cover the cost of raising a family. Women are particularly attracted to a man with assets, such as a house or business. Men can makeup for what they don’t have by boasting an aptitude to gain it in the future, such as offering intelligence, ambition, and an education.
As you can see, online dating success is not so much what you have, but how you package and present it!
Photo via Chud Tsankov Illustrations
